Heat

We are gearing up for a heat wave.  Other people may laugh as it won't be THAT hot but to us here on the west coast it does not get this hot, EVER. It's not so much the temp that has me scared, it's the "feels like row below the temps"... 

We normally hover around the 22-24 mark in the summer which is just perfect for us. The majority of people in Vancouver do NOT have A/C in their homes and living next to the water, we do get a fair amount of humidity. It's not that lovely dry heat that comes in the desert areas of Canada or the US. 

So the plan this weekend is to drink water, eat salads and just sit. Can't take the dog out as he's just too hairy and too old and too fat to take the heat. Oh and I'm sure he heat will have me all bloated up like a blow fish too... :) good times. How ya'll live like this in the southern states??? 

conversion for anyone not in Canada :) 

and for comparison - this is LA next week:

Man I can whine!!! Oh well, vacation next week. Can't wait for the break.... 

The Shorts

Over the last few years, I've managed to lose upwards of 35 lbs and for the most, kept it off. About 18 did creep back in 2020 but I've lost just about all of those 18 lbs now. I think I have 3 to go. 

So, I've done well. I know I move better, that my body is healthier and that my clothes are fitting so much better. I actually feel GREAT on some mornings when I put on my clothes and look in the mirror. Oddly, I do not have a full length mirror in my bathroom or bedroom so I never really truly know how I look from head to toe. But my upper half looks good to me! 

For the last 10 years or so I have had ONE pair of shorts that I would wear.  They are jersey fabric, loose, with a tie string waist so they have fit me when I was 215 and now at 170.  I caught sight of myself in our security footage last week and could not believe how ugly those shorts were. I always thought they were cute.  They were WAY too big on me and somehow my body looked unbalanced. 

So I decided to pull out my "vacation shorts" and some that I recently bought. Much shorter and more tailored and I actually wore them out shopping this weekend, so IN PUBLIC. I usually would only wear my vacation shorter shorts either on vacation or on truly hot days and only in the backyard. But I am trying to get past the fact that nobody actually cares how I look and they are not staring at me hoping I would have just lost another 10-15 before attempting to wear shorts. 

So I've been feeling good. It's been a struggle but I'm getting there and proud that I feel better in my own skin.  Well guess what, this time when I looked on my security footage, loading things into my car.  I looked frumpy and a lot bigger than I thought I was. UGH

I know it's self-confidence. I know that I am feeling and looking so much better than I was before but I still have issues when I see a photo (or video) of myself and I don't look as good as I imagined I did. 

It's something I know I have to work on. I love myself much more than I did years ago but it will be a struggle for awhile longer. 

Until then, I will press on and in the meantime, I need to go add some sunless tanner to my legs cause them babies sure are white compared to the rest of me! 

The Stubborn Snacker

 Me? Yeah, I'm stubborn, but not even close to my husband's stubbornness! Drives me crazy sometimes! 

The one thing that he is being really stubborn on now is his health. He keeps promising me that he's going to go see the doctor for an annual (more like 5 years for him) and have a check up done. He doesn't want to go because our family doctor is going to tell him he's fat.  He doesn't want anyone to tell him he's fat, even though he is and even he complains about it. 

But I do truly worry about his health. He's always been a very very healthy guy all his life. No blood pressure issues, no diabetes, blood work always excellent. But up until the last 3-4 years, he's also always been at a fairly healthy weight. When I met him he was about 170 lbs, which in my mind was waaaay too skinny and after we had 2 kids and about 20 years of marriage and after I gained a bunch of weight he went up to about 220. Not huge, not totally unhealthy but just a bit fluffy... Dad bod. :)  He's also 6'3". 

I'd say in the last 4-5 years he's gained another 60-75 lbs. Hard to tell on him as he is a big guy and he can carry that weight just about anywhere, but he is carrying a lot of it in his mid section right now. Right where the doctor's tell you to be careful with. 

When I lost all my weight in 2018, I really thought he would join in with me but it seems to be worse now. 

Some of my habits have changed, including my need to go to bed early each night. I tend to go to bed between 8:30 and 9:30 each night. I like to do my skin care routine and settle with a book at night. I find it helps me sleep a bunch better. 

The issue is when I go to bed, he snacks. A Lot. 

I don't want to nag him to stop eating and to make better choices, but I do. I try not to, but now the boys are nagging him as well. It seems to have the reverse effect on him. When we nag, he tends to snack more when we are not around. 

Not sure what else I can do but just be there to "support" him. I eat a low carb diet which can have some higher fats in it. That is fine because I'm not eating carbs along with it. The problem is that he eats what I eat PLUS the carbs. So bad bad bad.  I do buy carbs as my boys eat them so they are in the house. 

I really don't want him to have to hit a rock bottom to wake up and so something about it, but I fear that is what is going to happen. 

 I hate wanting to help so bad, but he's not wanting my help. Pains me every single day. 

0621

June 2021. 

It's June - I can't believe it. 

Where has the time gone?

This past weekend was my birthday weekend and we celebrated Covid-19 style... so basically the same as every other weekend. :)  It's all good. had a few meals out with the hubs,  dinner at home with the  family and a few friends came by for drinks and a fire on Saturday night.  Another year older. Yay Me. 

So here we are in June so almost halfway through the year so I figured I'd check where I have come from since January. 

Weight wise - at the start of January I was 177.5. Last Wednesday I was 170.4 so a 7 lb difference or around 1.4 lbs per month. The January weight would have likely been a bit higher due to Christmas/New Years as well. 

So many ups and downs in my weight that I honestly thought I was further along in my journey to get to 155 than that. 

I have made some changes over the last 6 months with my food and my supplements and although I do think my insides are healthier, I'm not too thrilled with the changes on the scale. 

2 weeks ago I decided to change up my eating a bit. Reduce the number of snacks that I have in a day and see if it changes anything. The jury is still out on the results. I have not yet tested my fasting glucose as I will wait a few more weeks and get a good month in before I test again. The transition to no snacking was not as hard as I thought it would be. After a few days of "thinking" I was hungry during my snack time, I managed to get through them and now I can easily get through between breakfast and lunch and then again dinner, without having to grab a treat. 

I have not been tracking my food but without the snacks, I should be in a range of 1000-1500 a day which is good for me. 

I'm still weighing every day and see the fluctuations happen. Last Friday I saw 168.4 which is the lowest in a few years so that did get me excited. We will see what happens tomorrow but so far, not looking like it's going to be that low.