Tuesday, December 18, 2018

Catch up

Wow - it's been over 2 weeks since I last posted. I've been very busy getting things ready for Christmas but I think I'm finally almost ready.  Close. Grocery shop on Thursday and maybe saturday for veggies but other than that, gifts are purchased and most are wrapped.... Phew!!

My weight is back up to 173. But all in all, I'm ok with that. We have had a few Christmas Parties and celebrations over the last few weeks. We also have a party on Saturday and one at our place on sunday and then Christmas at ours on monday so I'm not expecting to see a loss next week either.

Then there is the week between xmas and new years which is always lots of dinners/lunches out with friends. I don't think we will do much for New Years this year... just keep it quiet.

So...down lots of water in the meantime and one more Zumba tonight to get the body moving and relaxed going into the crazy weekend.

Not much else to say... just needed to do a mental check in before we hit the big crazy weekend.


Monday, December 3, 2018

Crack in the stall and WHW

This morning's weigh in.... 170!!!! BAM!!!

3 lbs from last monday.  I know some of it has to do with my cycle as I always seem to drop on day one but who cares? That is the lowest I have seen my weight in as long as I can remember!!

So success.... and we carry on.  What did I do differently this past week ?

I ate more veggies, snacked less at night, cut down on wine and nuts!!! YAY!!! I don't believe I consumed 10,000 less calories than normal but I'm sure there was some built up carb water weight from the past few weeks that I needed to flush out so all good!

Now to talk about today.. today is my yearly "volunteer" day from work. We get one day off a year to volunteer our time to a charity etc. Today I will be helping with the (WHW)  women helping women - south delta group.

This is a venture that was put together by two of my dearest friends a few years back. After donating to a group collecting beauty products for women on vnacouver's downtown east side, these group of friends decided to bring the spirit of paying it forward  closer to home. In 2010, we managed to put together 52 baskets for a residential recovery home for women.

When the baskets were delivered, a young girl peeked inside her gift and started to cry. She saw a pink disposable razor in her package and said she had been waiting for a week to shave her legs because she couldn't afford one.  A pink disposable razor - something most of us take for granted - cause such a reaction! It was that moment that froze in our minds and why we move on with this cause. Last year we made over 800 pampering gift bags!!

The goal behind this project is simple - to give a pampering gift to a woman, mother, sister or daughter going through a tough time in her lift. As beautiful as the holidays are for most of us, they can be incredibly sad for those that find themselves in a less than ideal situation. A card of encouragement is included in each gift and the only thing we ask in return is that one day, when they are on solid ground again, just pay it forward somehow.

This cause makes me so proud of the women in our community that look out for each out and support them. I cry badly each year as we pack up these packages and then wait for the houses to come and pick them up. It's such a great cause to be a part of....

So I'm going to start my day. Grab a coffee, grab some tissue and some healthy snacks and get moving!!


Monday, November 26, 2018

A kick start

Need to get serious. I have been stalled for almost 6 weeks now. My weight has fluctuated between 173 and 175. Today I'm back at 173, which is the same weight that I was at last Monday.

Need to get things moving again. I've let more wine creep back into my life as well as the occasional bite/lick of carbs (buns, scones etc). Have to stop it completely.

So this week, I'm going to be cognoscente of exactly what I eat. I'm going to continue to skip breakfast, other than my BPC coffee, but lunch and dinner must have more veggies and other non carb fillers in them.

I know I've been slipping. The wine has been entering on thursday night and sunday as well now, rather than just a glass or two on friday and saturday. Must stop that. At least for the next few weeks. Once Christmas comes it all kinda goes out the window anyway but I can try and reel things in until then.

On the weekend I will put up the tree and decorations. I think N is home for the weekend so maybe he will help too.. :) Doubt it.

R is off this weekend on a road trip with his team and Shawn is working. So I will have the house to myself, which I love but which can also be tough as I tend to snack more when I'm alone.

So back at it..... starting today !


Thursday, November 15, 2018

Healthy competition

I have a friend. No, let me correct that. I have a life partner (not in that way though), my best friend in the world I have known since I was 6. We have been friends for what seems like forever and she is my go to. We have different personalities but we get along great. Our husbands are friends and our boys are best friends and currently live together in college. Funny enough, we also both struggle with our weight. We have yo-yo dieted throughout our lives together.

Typically she starts the diet, tells me about it and then I join in. We are competitive. Not in the sense of I lost more than you did, but it's a healthy competition that keeps us accountable. If she loses 2 I want to lose 2 etc. It's always worked for us, until it hasn't. And funny enough, we typically stop our diets at around the same time. Not sure if its because one stops and the other gets bored of not having the competition and accountability or what?

This time it was different. Is started this diet on my own and didn't tell anyone. It wasn't until about 2 months in that I told her. She wanted to start as well but had 2 large vacations on the horizon and didn't want to start something so close to her trip. So she picked October 1st as her start date. And she did....

Here is the pickle.. she's struggling a bit with this diet and I'm struggling a lot right now. I haven't changed my eating much, but as I have written the last few times, I'm letting snacks and badness creep back into my diet. And it's showing on the scale. I recognize that these are not cravings but rather eating out of convenience or out of boredom. I grab a pack of halloween candy cause it's there, not cause I want it. I add peanut butter to my cauliflower crackers cause it was left open on the counter, not cause I wanted it. An extra 50 calories here and extra 50 calories there, really add up.

So why? Why was I doing so well until she started? It's like we want to succeed or fail together. I need to get back at it. I need to forget about competitions and other such nonsense and get my shit together!!

I was up again last week... 175. Not happy about that. My period arrived however and now I seem to be back and holding steady at 173.5.

GAH!!! I don't want to have to start tracking again, but it might come to that.

Happy to say I'm keeping up with my zumba and it does help clear my mind and also get my heart pumping! Need to add a bit more to get this heart happy!


Wednesday, November 7, 2018

22 years

It's been 22 years since the most important person in my life left this earth. I was a kid at the time, only 24 years old and I don't think I fully appreciated her or appreciated the little time I had left with her. I was selfish and preferred to spend time with my new husband than I did with my dying mom.

I think I truly believed that she would be around forever. I somehow thought that if I stayed away from her withering self I could delay the inevitable. Mom died on the morning of the 7th, 1996 following an evening where her 3 children and husband happened to be together under the same roof. It was a rarity for us all to be together at one time as we typically took turns staying with mom to help give Dad a bit of a break. That night we were all there as we wanted to sit down and discuss whether to continue the radical treatment or not. In the end Mom, decided for us and left us that evening.

I ache that she never got to meet any of her grandchildren. She would honestly have been the most amazing grandmother. I see so much of my mom in both my boys. N has her absolute caring nature and R has her wild quirky side.

I've gone on in life and think about you often but it's this day that I think about how much you truly meant to me and how I wished I had done things differently. If I could only spend one day, one hour, one more minute with you... 

I miss you Mom....



Friday, November 2, 2018

Set Backs

It's been awhile since I posted and as stated before, if I don't post I tend to lose my own personal accountability. I saw my weight creep back up to 176 this week... I think I'm back down to 173 now but it also means I haven't lost anything in over 3 weeks.  I know why. It's cause I've slacked, I've had set backs and in all honesty, I've let junk come back into my life.

Candy... I love candy. I bought candy for halloween - mostly for R because we stopped giving out candy a few years ago because it stresses the dog out so much every time the door bell would ring. Plus, he has a scary bark which is not good for the littles.  In addition,  that trick or treater numbers in our neighbourhood have dimished over the years. When we first moved here 16 years ago, we would get hundreds of kids.. now maybe, 20. Maybe. It's not worth it.

So I've had a bit of candy. But the real issue is I haven't been eating healthy. I've had very little veggies, other than cucumber and most of my snacking has been cashews!!! or cheese.  So not a whole lot of nutrition going into my body. And it's laziness. I don't want to take the time to make up a healthy snack so I just grab what's there. I have to get back to planning meals or at least planning to have good food in my house so when I'm hungry and need to snack, there are healthy options.

Eating low carb can be tricky sometimes to find good healthy food and often that means I'll just skip the snack all together or eat a handful of nuts. Cheese is good once and awhile, but sometimes I feel like a cheese wheel at the end of the day!!

This week has been a week of money flying out the window. R returning to play hockey here has ended up costing us 12K and our furnace blew which was another 5K... it's been a crappy week.

Going to go down to the freezer right now and take out something for dinner tonight and fill up my empty water glass :) . We normally go to the pub for dinner on fridays but will skip tonight. Plans for steak dinner tomorrow with friends so tonight it's a home cooked meal!  Gotta start somewhere!!

I know stress has been a contributing factor to my laziness for health and planning but I need to get back on track. Christmas is just around the corner and the stress is going to pile on so might as well get it under control now....


Monday, October 22, 2018

Who am I doing this for?

My answer to this question will always be myself and my loves. I'm doing it so I'm healthier and so that I hopefully have more time on this earth to spend with my babies and one day their babies .

Easy right?

So why is it so frustrating when others don't notice that I've lost? I have lost 36 lbs in 4 months and I have had very few friends comment on my weight.  Last saturday at dinner my good friend Kris said, "by the way, you look awesome!" She might have been talking about my fab outfit but I think she was actually talking about  my transformation.

Nobody else has said anything. You would think 36 lbs would be enough for people to notice. I'm down one full size in my clothes but maybe it's not enough to really tell.

We were out saturday and sunday with people that I have not seen since July so they must have noticed right?

Just needed to get that out. It shouldn't bother me, but it does. Yes, I'm doing this for ME and my loves, but I just want some sort of comment on how much work I've put in to better myself from those that don't see me everyday!!!

I cheated this weekend. It was my first non planned cheat. Saturday night R had a game and we did not get out of the arena until almost 8pm. We had no plans for dinner at all and I really did not want to go to a restaurant at that time. So we stopped by the store on the way home and picked up some boneless wings and fixins for nachos.  I only ate 3 or 4 nachos so I was good in that sense but I did eat a bunch of the chicken which was breaded. Again not terrible. And then, cause I was bored, I ate a cinnamon bun !!! It wasn't even that good. It's not terrible, but I was mad that I even bothered eating it. Slip ups are going to happen but I prefer to plan for them, not just do it cause I was bored and still a bit hungry. I must plan better with food and ensure that we have appropriate snacks at home.

There would never have been cinnamon buns at home usually, but with R at home now, I have the sweets and treats that he loves. He's 16, he can eat them and still be rake thin. Plus he sweats so much and burns so many calories working out and playing hockey all the time, he has nothing to worry about...yet! :)

So all in all the calories were not terrible, the carbs were manageable but it was my attitude that I was disappointed with. Was I mad that nobody had noticed my loss and decided that I needed that bun?

I'm up a lb this week which I'm not surprised about at all... a few other slip ups this weekend and wine friday, saturday and sunday does not help.  Oh well, back at it today!!




Wednesday, October 17, 2018

Coming out of the fog

The stress is slowly lifting.  Older boy seems to be less stressed at school and younger one has decided to come home. It's all good. Another year at home is not going to kill any of us, even if my home will be once again a messy disaster!!

Here is what I do have a bit more worry about - my hair loss. It's already thin to start with but I think this way of eating has exasperated the thinning.  I just bought a plethera of products online to hopefully help with it. I have also been taking biotin and collegen for a few weeks now so hopefully we will start to see some difference.

One other worry and I'm sure it's  not really a worry and even writing about it makes me think I'm silly..but I do worry about not being able to stop losing weight.

I'm currently at 172.5. No, not underweight by any means but I feel like I have not really been doing anything differently lately but the weight still comes off. This is even after a mini vacation with BEER and Wine and lots of other indulges.

I have set my new goal for 165. I'm not far from that goal now and even at that weight I will still be considered overweight... yup, I think I'm officially crazy!!  163 is what will put me into normal weight zone based on BMI scale.  So maybe I should stop worrying about something as silly as "will I ever stop losing"... to just accepting that this is working and I need to keep with it.

Now If I could only grow some hair.... on  my head!!! :)


Wednesday, October 10, 2018

Stressors...

Stress is wearing me down. I stress when my kids stress and both are stressing right now. The older one is stressing about an economics professor that is definitely not qualified to be teaching at a university level.  Oder one is always worried about grades and tests and gets anxiety quite often. When he gets anxiety, I stress and it's midterms right now... so will be a few weeks of stress.

Younger son is stressing because he misses home and is the only young guy on the team. He's qualified but like with every goal in life, you need to start at the bottom and work your way up. He's never been in that position before.  He called me monday night - or rather texted me and said, mom I want to come home and I don't care what you say. 

UGH!!! So he's working through it. Admitted that he's stressed and misses home but will think about it before making any decisions. I don't want him to come home. Not cause I don't love him, but I want him to push through adversity. It's hard, I know that but I think in the end he will be happy that he did so.  I won't push him to do anything and any decision is up to him in the end but you always want to see your kids succeed. Hopefully with a few less tears....

We went away for the weekend and the dog's hot spots flared again. So I think he stresses when we go away too. Older son treated them and they have started to heal but OMG... so much stress surrounding me.

Didn't sleep monday night so passed on Zumba last night. Wish I had gone as it would have been good to sweat out some thoughts.  I did sleep really well however last night.

My hair is also thinning which I think is a combination of the diet.... and stress.

I think it's time to move the aromatherapy diffuser into my office!!!  Need to google good scents for stress relief.



Monday's WI was 175.5 down 1 from last week

(so a total of 31.5 lbs lost!!!) And this after a weekend of food and drinks!


Monday, September 24, 2018

Planes trains and automobiles

Took a few planes, drove in a few automobiles and slept next to some trains this weekend. All covered!

Went to visit my little one this past weekend and take in some of his hockey games. 2 flights there and back and a few hours driving to one of the games but it was all good.

We were able to stay at his billet's house which was lovely and nice that we could save on the hotel. She does live right next to a rail line however and there are between 20-35 trains that pass each day. Railcars that carry grain from Alberta to saskatchewan and beyond.  Some are quiet and some not so much.

It was a quick weekend but nice to see the boy and have some snuggle time with him. His girlfriend traveled with me so it was nice to have a companion on the plane and in the car!

Ate horrible and very little.  Lots of candy... cause I'm a sucker for candy and the house we were out had bowls of it! I had onion rings on saturday night at the arena because we had had a very early dinner and by 9pm I was starving.  But also at not much else. Just did not seem to be hungry at all on the weekend.

Weigh in this morning was 176.5.  I'm pretty sure that number will start to rise again a bit this week when I start consuming actual calories again!

I wasn't going to set a true goal weight but I think I'm going to put 165 in my radar. Maybe even possible before christmas????

I like that number because it's middle of the range 160-170 so if I gain a lb or two there won't be panic. Or at least I hope not.  And if I lose a lb or two it won't put me into the 150s.... and then allow the panic of when I only stay there a very short time and then creep back into the 160s!! It's all a mind game isn't it?!  I also like 165 because that will officially take me out of the overweight category on the BMI scale...   haven't been there in forever!!


Monday, September 17, 2018

I feel like the worst mom in the world

My baby is not well.

Fur baby that is.

When we took our youngest to Alberta we left our dog with our older boy here at home. A few days into our trip and our son noticed there was something on Murphy's back. Probably a mosquito bite or something similar. We had him wash it and then treat it with some antibiotic that he had. He noticed it a few days after we left. When we returned from our trip he still had the sores but didn't seem to be too bad so we figured it would heal on it's own. Didn't appear to be itchy and he wasn't bothered with it.

About a week later we took him for a bath and scrubbed him down really good to get off all the stink from the dog farm that he played at daily while we were away.

Then a few days later we noticed a greeny colored sticky mess near the wound area. I figured it was flared up again and oozing. The green color indicated to me that it was infected and we needed to get him antibiotic. A different one than the spray that we had been using. Plus we were almost out of the spray anyways.

So this past saturday we took him to the vet. I figured they would dig around through is fur and give us an antibiotic to treat it. Well the vet said, they would really need to clip the area to get a good look at how bad it was and be able to treat it properly.



UGH!!! I feel like the worst mommy in the world. The good thing is that it is exposed now so it can start healing but it's ugly and he's BALD!!! 

I'm mad cause of course, I figured I could just treat it myself. If I knew the large area I could just massage in the medicine. 

And will the fur grow back?? Of course, I've ready horror stories on the internet that says it wont... but the vet assured us that it will - in about 3 months. 

So I've bought him a coat in the meantime to use on our walks if it's raining or a bit cold. 

My poor BABES!!!! 

WI this week was 178..... Yippee.... who cares?!  I'm too mad!! 



Wednesday, September 12, 2018

Feeling the Fall

Yep, we are definitely on the swing to fall! It's cold, I dragged out all my old sweaters the other day and did some picking and choosing as to which ones will make it back into regular rotation for this fall. I did end up putting together a bag for good will. Mostly of clothes that I either don't like the style any longer or they are just too big!

It's a great feeling but there is so much fear about getting rid of clothes as my mind "assumes" that I will be back there again one day. It's a crutch, having those old big clothes hang around and I don't want to allow it any longer. SO I'm sending them off... in a big black bag, hopefully never to return.

I do need to get some new clothes though. My pants are getting loose and with Zumba starting up again next week, I want to be able to go to the class and not worry about losing my leggings throughout the routine!  Ordered a few cheap items on Old Navy that should get me through the next few months.

WI this monday was good again  - down 1.5 to 179.5.  Almost 30 lbs! ..... wow

Need to pack up the patio furniture this weekend and put it all away for another year.... I will miss not sitting in the backyard at the fire pit! Oh well, I will just have to fire up the inside fireplace instead I guess!

That was pretty much a post with a whole lot of nothing to speak about.... signing off.

Friday, September 7, 2018

September Blues

Is it just me, or does it feel like as soon as we turn the calendar page from August to September that it suddenly feels like fall. Summer is over.  Well not technically over, but here on the coast, the nights become cooler, sometimes the rain rolls in and it just feels a bit chillier.  I need to have my jacket on when we walk at night with the pup and we turn off all the fans around the house that have somehow become a part of our "white noise" of summer.

Although the temperature is the best at this time of year, September is not typically my favorite month.   I find most Septembers I tend to get the blues.  I think I can attribute it to when the kids would head back to school and it would mean that all our long weekends and summer getaways had come to an end for another year.  The last few years, it's been a little easier with me working from home and the kids being self sufficient heading back to school.

This year is different.  The older kid has headed back to university again. And even though he's only a few hours away and he will hopefully come visit often, I miss him.  I love the man that he has become. He was always my gentle soul. Always polite and respectful but he has truly turned into a wonderful human being. I know our years with him calling our home "home" are limited as he will only have a few years left of university and then will likely move out on his own.  I dread that day. For now I cherish the weekends that he will travel home with a bag or two of laundry and the yearning for a good home cooked meal and when spring comes and he is home again for a few short months.

And then there is my little man. Still a high school student for a few more years but this year has taken on the journey of leaving our province for another to play hockey. He's different than my big guy. He's risky, adventurous and crazy some times. But he's all mine and I miss him terribly. I am going to try and visit him as often as I can for both of us and count down the days until Christmas when I can have them both under my roof!

My house is clean and quiet and I hate it. I want to pick up socks and coats and other such things that they have left behind as they move from room to room. I want to do a big grocery shop each week, knowing that they will have eaten mostly everything by mid week and I'll have to go back again and get more supplies to get them through to the weekend. I want the chaos.

All I have to say is thank god for Facetime!!

I've been away for the past few weeks in Alberta moving the kid, but I'm back now. Had a few slip ups with meals while I was away cause we did eat out a lot and there really is just no controlling carbs when you are eating out so much.  But I came back and weighed in this past monday and I am down again! So I'm happy about that.... 181.0!!!

Seriously, I can't remember when I last saw that number.  SO close to my personal goal of 175 but think I'll keep going for a bit more as I will still be in the "overweight" BMI category  and I'd like to get that a little lower.


Wednesday, August 22, 2018

A new chapter

It was a stressful week last week - preparing my little one (16) to leave home for the year to play hockey in another province. Ugh... I was doing ok until the last few days when his girlfriend would come visit. I could clearly see the distress in both of them as they looked at the dwindling days and hours ahead of them.   He was strong and brave though and when we dropped him at the airport on monday, he gave us all hugs and then quickly turned away to go through security. 

I know it was because he was likely crying and didn't want us to see him. But chatting with him later that night he sounded really good. I'm very proud of him.  We head to see him on friday and will spend a week with him and then I will visit each month. The 7 months should go by quickly.... at least I hope so. I miss him already.

There were a few celebrations this week. We had the boys going away party with the addition of dad's birthday party. I only had a sliver of cake (it was really good)!   But I did tend to drink a bit more wine than I usually do on the weekend/weeknight.  Next week probably won't be very good for that either.

It's my time of the month this week as well- started yesterday. Oh yay!

Oh and got a call back from the lab that my blood test numbers were out of whack and I need to revisit the doctor. Great... it's my WBC. It's high again at 11.2.  I was reading around though and it looks like that can increase when the cholesterol also increases due to this diet. I guess I'll get retested. I feel awesome though, so I don't think it's an infection....

I always hover between 8.5 ad 11.5... I've been as high as 15.6 before as well.

Off next week to see little man so  not sure I'll update but will try. Even if it's just a sentence or two.

Weight this week was down 2 lbs... I need to get new bras!!  Which is great... and not so great. Hate bra shopping


Monday, August 13, 2018

Another Year, another Physical

This one was different. Doc was PUMPED at my weight loss. He was so excited he mentioned it a few times.  I told him what I was doing and he seemed happy and did not have any concerns.

He said my skin looked much clearer and everything else appeared to be in working order!

My blood pressure was high. But I explained to him that it was low in the morning 110/85 but in the office it jumped to 150/90. At the time I was wearing nothing but a white paper sheet however.  I said, c'mon!!

I asked what I could do to reduce my BP meds. He said we can revisit in a few months but I would have to go back to wear the 24 hour test monitor as he can never get a good reading from me in the office (damn, white coat syndrome)!!!

The u/s that I had on my boob last month did show some abnormalities. Nothing overly alarming but they want to revisit it in 6 months and ultra sound it again.  BOO!!! Oh well, no sense in stressing it now, right.

My weight was down again today to 185!!

I'm starting to stress about little man moving away next week. I think I'll end up visiting him every month until he's back in April! :(


Tuesday, August 7, 2018

Short Update

Not much to report. Was a pretty ho hum week with a long weekend at the end!!! YAY

Had a few BBQs to attend this weekend but made great choices. It is becoming so much easier to find foods and make adjustments.   But still nobody said anything to me about how I look any different!

I feel different though, so for now that is good enough for me!  And my clothes fit so much better than they did a few months ago.

I have my annual check up on friday. A bit worried about it but we will see what he says. I'll update after the checkup so that I have a record for myself.

Weight was down again to 187 yesterday which is down from last week but not greatly down from 2 weeks ago. Have to start tracking again and see where my numbers are at. I might have to redo my numbers again as well seeing as I'm down 20. I have read that it's best to readjust numbers every 20 or so lbs.

I will do that.

Not much else..... until Friday or likely monday because the appointment is at the end of my day on friday.

Monday, July 30, 2018

A blip in the road

I knew it would happen. The dreaded time when the weight would stop the downward trend and either stall or start to creep up.

Normally this would not bother me but it does because it's around that magic number again that I repeatedly have issues with. It's honestly like my body rejects losing any additional weight.

My weight this monday was 189.0 back up 1.5 lbs. Now, I know that it's TOM weight as I'm right smack in the middle of it and I know I didn't not drink as much water as I should have this weekend but still, it's that damn magic number.

One thing to note is that my cycle was 29 days this month as opposed to the 24-26 days that it has been for the last year or so. Not sure it means anything, just worth noting.

Back to my weight - hopefully this time I press on and continue to work at getting the number down again.

I've decided to add IF (intermittent fasting) into my daily life as well, at least on the weekdays. I've done it before but I've been a little slack lately and my eating hours have been creeping later into the evening.

I don't eat breakfast unless it's on the weekend but I do get up early so this could be tough. I will ease into it.

Today I'll do a 10-6ish and then try to work my way up to 11am. I do like to have my BPC in the AM as it keeps me full until lunchtime, but I'll have to put that off until later in the morning now. I still want to have it because I get my healthy fats in with the coffee which I don't necessarily get later in the day. Plus I think it's better to eat the fats in the am rather than at night. No scientific reason or proof for that other than it makes sense to me! :)

So mini goals this week - drink more water and try to get on IF routine.

The heat should be leaving us later this week - thank god! It's been crazy hot.... need to get back out for my daily walks with the pup!


Monday, July 23, 2018

Successes for Weight Loss

Having been on a number of diets over the past 16 years I've come to the conclusions that when dieting, certain things will lead to success. No matter the diet, I have had success when I follow these things:


  • Weigh in Often (whether it be daily or weekly) as it keeps me accountable 
  • In some way, track calories - it doesn't matter whether you are low carb, high carb, low fat, tracking points etc, it still matters how many calories I stuff into my face daily 
  • Write down my thoughts and feelings - whether it be here in this blog that is generally just for me or in a diary somewhere. It's good to write out feelings and thoughts as they add to the accountability aspect
  • Plan  - I don't plan my entire day but I will try to plan out what I will eat as best as possible. Breakfast and lunch are usually pretty easy but dinner can be a struggle. If I know I'm going out I try to peruse the menu before I get there to understand what I should order. 

They seem like common sense but I have been in the habit of when the weight starts to come off and I feel happy about how I'm doing on the weight loss journey, I tend to slack off on the list above. I might stop weighing in every day or weekly and suddenly it's a month since my feet have touched the scale and low and behold there are 5 new lbs on it. 

When I get comfortable, the tracking stops. I am actually getting to that point already and I need to be better at it. When the tracking stops, the calories usually increase too! I stop planning my meals and wing it when getting to the restaurant and tend to make not so great choices. 

It's a way of life and I want it to be easy but I also need to be a strict with myself as possible. Who knows what will happen when/if I get to my goal weight and I have to switch to maintenance. Hopefully by then eating and making great choices will be a way of life for me and I won't need to track as much. I still have a long way to go before I start thinking about that. 

Found a great little low carb bakery this weekend and bought a stash of breads, and cookies etc. Everything is made with a flax flour so a slice of bread weighs a lot but it's good for curbing the craving. Had a slice yesterday with an egg on top and it was very filling. The cookies will be good for when I feel like I need a sweet (like around the TOM) which is coming up real soon! 

I changed my weigh in day to mondays. I don't like sundays as I usually indulge on friday/saturdays so my weight seems to be highest on sundays with all the salt retention etc. Also, monday is the official start of my week so it makes more sense to be on a monday. I used to like thursdays as well but we will go with monday for now.  Yesterday's weigh in was 189 (magic number y'all)!!! Actually it came back pretty quickly after last sunday but I didn't want to officially count it until this week. And I DID decide to change my weigh in day last night (not this morning) and this morning's weight and official weigh in WAS...........











187.5 !!

say what?!!!! Holy Shit batman!!! 




Monday, July 16, 2018

Goal Weights and Disappointments

Last week was ho hum. Nothing too interesting to report other than the same old story. I do feel like I have more energy this week and I'm working at building the energy even more.  IT's been hot this week however, so some of the tiredness etc is weather related.

I had a true HIGH and LOW this weekend. My high was that on Saturday when I weighed myself I was 189.0. This is the lowest weight that I have been in over 10 years. Last year I managed to get myself down to 189.5 but then right after that I inched higher until I gained back enough to put me back over 200 lbs.

So, imagine how I felt all day saturday... I felt amazing and even more excited to be able to record the great number the next day on sunday. Well I weighed in sunday and I was back to 190.


I tell myself over and over that the scale numbers don't matter. But they do!

So after having my minor pity party I recorded the 190.0 in my journal which still puts me down 1 lb but it wasn't the magic number that I wanted.

Here is the deal though.... if i didn't weigh in daily, I would not have seen that 189.0. Trying to decide if that is motivation that I did actually see it or if it would have been better if I had not?

Oh and went for dins with friends on friday night and again, nobody noticed the loss. :(  I thought I was noticing something when I looked in the mirror, but to add to my disappointment, I took progress pics of myself yesterday and I look exactly the same as I did 10 lbs ago. EXACTLY THE SAME.

When will I see a difference? I feel a difference, but I don't see it yet. Will it be 25lbs, 30 lbs etc? 

Maybe it's the fat from inside my body that is melting, or maybe it's just water weight. You still would think there would be less bloating or something.

Oh well, pressing on.




Monday, July 9, 2018

Plugging along

I have to admit, I feel a good 50% better than I did last week. Maybe it was a cold, maybe it was Keto flu but whatever it was, it's gone..

I still lack some energy but I think that is still part of the diet. Can't wait until I get a BURST of energy, like so many talk about.

WI yesterday showed down another 2 lbs! Woot woot.. That means I'm at a total of 16 down.

Had a bit of a scare on Friday - the previous friday I had my annual mammogram and on friday (one week later) I received a call from the hospital that I needed to return for an ultrasound. Luckily they were able to schedule me in within the hour so I didn't have much time to fret and worry.  Of course I did take to google to see what the percentage of cancer was found on "call back" mammograms. The numbers never look good online do they, even if it is only 17%.  It just ended up that I have a boob full of cysts, with the biggest being .6 cm.  Technician said nothing to worry about but they wanted to get some new measurements seeing as it had been almost 5 years since they measured them last. So.... after that excitement my weekend was kinda blah!

Went to a friends for dinner on friday night and I have to admit I was a bit disappointed that they didn't say anything about my weight loss. I def thought it was noticeable but I guess it's not as much as I thought. I hadn't seen them in a few moths either so it's not like they have seen me every day since I began this new way of eating. Oh well, I press on.

Good points were that I was able to stay on track at the dinner. I did end up having 4 drinks and I have to admit that I really cannot hold my alcohol any longer. OUCH.. I used to be able to drink a bottle of wine and now it's 2 or 3 glasses and I'm feeling loopy!

Sunday we lazed and just did chores around the house. Tried a few new recipes yesterday and and they were all failures!  Some things just can't be substituted!

Eg.  Roasted Radishes for roasted potatoes.. NECHT!

Low Carb cheese buns..  They will do in a pinch but I can't say I enjoyed them that much!

Hubby is slowly starting to fall off the diet. He ordered a beef dip this weekend when we went out for dinner and he had higher carb beers.  I'm not going to nag him even though it pains me to see him not taking care of his body. And the selfish part in me just wants him to do it with me, cause it's so much easier when you are doing it with someone.  He was happy with his results the last month but I think the boredom of food just got to him.  Maybe he will jump on the band wagon again..



Tuesday, July 3, 2018

Summer sickness

I have a cold.. or Keto flu - whatever it is, I don't fee good. No energy, my nose is all plugged up and I have a headache. This is going on day 5...sick of it.

Although the throat does not hurt as much as it did last week, but it is still nagging and the phlegm is nasty. Oh well, lots of fluids, plugging through it.

Weigh in was Sunday - which was also my start of Shark Week!

193 bitches!!! that's down 3 lbs from last sunday.

I was pretty excited to see that figuring I would be on the upturn of the scale with the TOM week and all but looks like I held strong.

I have been hungry... so hungry so I can attribute that to TOM of month week for sure and the scale kinda showed that today. I was up 2 lbs from sunday... but I have faith it will be gone by next weigh in. Or it better be!!

This week is all about keeping healthy, getting my water in and a few walks. No Zumba for me tonight, I'm just too tired.

A few things I've noticed on this diet so far:
1) I'm rarely hungry - other than TOM
2) I do not crave sweets much at all anymore and I LOVE SWEETS!!  I could devour an entire bag of candy before if it were put in front of me!
3) I am getting to love veggies. I used to like veggies but I would rather eat a banana or apple over a cup of broccoli  I think much of that is because I am limited in what I can eat.
4) my skin is so much better!! I always had some sort of rashy-thing on my torso and it appears to be gone now!
5) little to no heart burn.
6) very little gas :) oops.... scuze me.

negative things I have noticed:
1) Carbs are in everything as are sugars so it's hard to stay completely away from them.
2) Limited food to eat
3) when I ask for no starches or breads to be brought with my dinner in a restaurant I don't always get a substitution and I have to pay the same amount.
For example on sunday we went for breakfast and I ordered an omelet and asked for no potatoes or toast. My bill was not any cheaper and I was not offered anything as substitution. Oh well..... the price we pay I guess.
4) I really dislike the taste of sugar substitutes
5) eating out is challenging sometimes.
6) muscle pains if I don't get all my electrolytes in!!

It's all still early in the process though, and so far I will take the good over the bad for sure.

We press on.....

1 month today!! :)

Monday, June 25, 2018

It can't really be this easy can it?

Don't get me wrong - I still have cravings for ice cream and glorious bread and candy (love me some wine gums) but all in all, I don't miss them as much as I thought I would.

Finding more ways to keep away from the sweets and feeling better and better each day.

Relaxing weekend at home. The weather was a bit iffy so we spent more time indoors than we are used to.

Friday night went for our usual trip to pub for dinner. I don't feel deprived ordering a burger /w cheese, bacon and mushrooms and a side of Caesar salad (no crutons).

We knew Saturday would be a challenge with the birthday party but all in all it was fine. We had a salmon dinner before we left so we were good and full. Had a few snipets of cheese and veggies/dip and NO CAKE!   It's getting easier.

Yesterday we slaved in the garage to clear out what felt like 12 years of crap.  Forgot to eat and felt like I was going to pass out at 1pm... oops.  Fueled up and continued on.

My feet were killing me by the end of the day. My right foot especially. I know you can get joint and other pains on this diet so it might have been a combination of standing on my feet all day and the diet.  Feel ok today so far.

Scale was down again yesterday from last weekend. 196.0 down 2.5 lbs!!  And a total of 11 lbs!

This week is scheduled shark week and I have my mammogram on Friday, so we will see what that weight says next weekend.  Not expecting a loss...




Monday, June 18, 2018

A new week...

Officially starting week 3 of this journey - so far so good. We had a few minor slip ups on the weekend, involving the drinkie drink, but all in all decent choices.

We went to my sisters for Father's day dinner last night and she is a recently changed from being a vegetarian to eating meat. She mostly did this because she was having problems with all the grains she was eating. So our dinner was super yummy and we could eat almost everything on the menu. Lovely fresh salmon, turkey burgers (sans bun) with a dreamy avacado salsa and a lovely summer salad. It was perfect and I managed to steal the recipe for turkey burgers (cause honestly, her's were so much better than mine)!

Had a few glasses of wine yesterday which likely put me over my carbs but all good. You have to celebrate sometimes, especially for dad. :)

Weigh in yesterday morning and guess what?!! Down 1.5 lbs. Whoot whoot!! So the stall I thought I was starting was not actually a stall, but I know it's coming but excited for what I see so far ;)

CW - 198.5

Not too many challenges this week. We have a 55th birthday dinner on saturday but it's BBQ again, so we should be able to get away with protein and a salad... it's the drinks that kill us!

Oh and I need to get some electrolytes, especially before Zumba tomorrow. Last week killed me, my legs were so dead, I thought I was going to drop on the floor 1/2 way through the class.

Friday, June 15, 2018

The start of the stall.....

Since taking on this new journey and new WOE (way of eating), I have been studying and looking up websites, watching videos and reading other's journeys to learn as much as I can.

This is a scientific diet that really deals with how the body burns energy and it can impact a lot of different areas of the body as well including my BP, cholesterol, thyroid etc so I need to keep on top of things.

I am needing to book a physical with doc in the next month or so and I'm a bit worried about the blood work that will have to be performed. I'm sure my cholesterol levels will be high as this diet does raise the numbers for most over the first 6 months. Oh well, it's a good base to start with.

I have also been reading a lot about the stall - the dreaded stall where you just don't lose any weight no matter how diligent you are with the diet. The information shows that this typically happens from week 2 - 6. And can last from 1 - 4 weeks!!! NO!!!!



I have never been on a diet where the weight loss stalls. No matter what I have done in the past, my food intake has determined how much I lose in a given week - I have been in complete control.

Sounds like I'm no longer in control based on what I put in my mouth. My body will decide when it's time to shed the weight etc.

So I am a daily weigher..... in other words, I weigh in every single day.  Sometimes multiple times a day - its' an obsession 😕. Well after losing 7 lbs last week, nothing has dropped off the scale... well that's not true, I might have shed another ounce.... UGH....

I must plug on. I feel so much better and my stomach is starting to slowly flatten so I need to make sure to make measurements and how my clothes are fitting the measurements of my successes for the next few weeks/months.

Going to be hard but I'm going to keep at it.  Sunday is weigh in day.... wish me luck!


Wednesday, June 13, 2018

Keto craziness take 1

I'm back - and doing something different again to try and lose this darn weight.  I'll skip back a bit though as there have been a few changes with me the last few years.

A few years ago I was diagnosed with High Blood pressure. I knew it would happen because both of my parents suffered from it and my dad is one of the fittest people you will ever meet.  I know my weight doesn't help keep the numbers low but my genes play a bit part.

After starting meds to stabalize my BP I decided to try some new diets. First it was Whole30 which worked while I was on but was hard to stay on, especially with summer and the fruits and the drinks!!

Then last April I decided to go back to Weight Watchers. Mostly because I wanted to lose some lbs before my son's graduation.  I went form 210 - 189 in about 2 months. I felt awesome and looked decent too! 

Then summer hit again and the diet stopped and the weight started to creep back.

Fast forward to today. Or rather a few days back and I was sitting at 207, so almost back to where I started last year and needing to do something again.

So after seeing a co-worker lose over 100 lbs doing the KETO diet I figured I might take a stab at it. I'm also very concerned about hubby as he has packed on the lbs the last 10 or so years and it seems to all be in his belly area. Not good.  I dont' know what his weight is at now, but I would guess somewhere around 275.  He's doing the journey with me.

So skip back to last sunday June 3rd, this is when we started Keto.

My starting weight was 207.

The first few days have been ok. Some days I have no energy and just want to lay on the couch.  But I have not had any flu like symptoms or headaches etc. I also had a period during that time which lasted the normal 4 days for me.

On June 10th, I weighed myself and I was down to 200. WHAT? 7 lbs!!! that's incentive to keep going right!?

Here are starting pics that I took Just so I can keep a bit of a record for myself. 

Hoping my skin will clear up a bit on this diet as well.... but worried about losing hair!





Starting measurements (after 1 week cause I didn't take them earlier)

Weight - 200
Waist - 41
Hips - 45
Bust 43.5

Here we goooooo again.