here we go again....

It's been awhile.. Actually a very long time since I have been here and not much has change. I have contemplated changing things up, changing the look and feel of this blog and I might just do that but I'm not ready just yet.

I need to back up first, just a bit. About 6 months worth of backing up. At the end of August I went for my overdue check up with the doc. I was scared of going because I knew I was heavier than I had been in past years and that he would be mad at me. What happened I did not expect and I was devestated from it.  During my routine exam of taking my pulse and checking my blood pressure, the doctor was unable to find a pulse (or a loud pulse) and my blood pressure was not loud enough to get a decent measure. That scared me. Scared me because of the way that I have let my body go and as a result my doctor was unable to get a good reading of my heart because of the fat in my body.

I left that doctor's office devestated. I cried for a good day (in private of course) and told myself that I was changing. I was going to become healthy, lose the weight and show the doctor and myself that I could take care of myself.

Did I? Uh no. I didn't. And hear I sit 6 months later in the same state that I was leaving that doctors office.

Well, that is up until 2 weeks ago. 2 weeks ago I joined WW again and I feel better. I am down 4.5 lbs and feeling more normal than I have in years. I see a light at the end of the tunnel and I'm going to head towards it!

It's not going to be easy. Actually it's going to be really hard but I have to do it for my health.

Lately I have had problems with my eyesight, my skin, frequent urination at night and I lookd it up yesterday and it might be a sign of diabetes. GAH! I have to turn my lift around now! Not yesterday, but now!!

So here is my pledge on this journey. I need to take care of me so that I am well enough in the future to take care of others.

It's going to take baby steps.. my first step is eating right and then I will add movement. I'd like to start running again but with my size right now that will be hard, and painful. We will see though. Baby steps.

WI day was yesterday and I was 206.5   UGH
But I stepped on the scale today and it it sang back to me 205.5 - not really sang but you know what I mean!!! Let's hoping it continues the downward spiral.

Peace out!
Momma